MY ADHD JOURNEY

For decades, I was told I didn’t have ADHD.

In 2023, when I was 52, I was finally diagnosed with ADHD.

For years, I talked to doctors, therapists, coaches, nutritionists, and even an ADHD doctor about my fatigue, anxiety, GI issues, and struggle to complete things. I was told to get more sleep, meditate, go to therapy, change my diet, and generally be and/or do less. I did all those things and still knew something wasn’t right.

I was also told I didn’t have ADHD  because I was too organized, too together, and too smart. (That last one made my blood boil.) They told me that I was too neat, not scattered enough. What made it so bad is that I got all of this from an ADHD doctor. I kept telling them: I don’t feel the way I think I should feel.

After years and years of repeating the same conversion, I started to feel like nothing was working and something was stuck inside of me.

Finally, I found a doctor who didn’t dismiss me or my symptoms. A woman. She helped me see how ADHD shows up differently in women. I was actually relieved when she called with my diagnosis. She said it wasn’t even a close call. Everything that I’d been experiencing, almost every single symptom, was ADHD.

Why I’m telling you this

Many of my coaching clients are advocates for other people, but they are still learning how to advocate for themselves. Advocacy is exhausting. It’s especially exhausting when you have to advocate for yourself because all sorts of feelings come up. Sometimes, intentionally or unintentionally, other people try to gaslight you. They might say, “But doesn’t everyone struggle with that?” or “That’s not how I experience you.”

This is especially true for women. A million times more true for women of color. Study after study shows women are not listened to by the healthcare system. So this is a reminder: it’s okay to admit you’re tired. The system is designed to keep you that way. When you know something is wrong, keep asking until you find someone who will listen.

Listening is at the center of my practice. If something we’re trying doesn’t work for you, tell me. 

If you feel like you’re doing all the things and still not moving forward, let’s talk about it. And if you’re neurodivergent like me, I get it. I won’t dismiss you. I won’t tell you what you need, either. Only you can figure that out. But I can help you uncover it.